REAL PLANT CARE. FICTIONAL THERAPY.
Is your plant going through something?
One plant. A personalised four-page botanical case file. Practical care, a plan worth keeping, and Felix Fern’s entirely fictional account of the situation.
Paid orders are not open yet.
Four-page PDF + readable web report.
AI-assisted plant care. Felix is a fictional correspondent.
Oliver.
On the matter of
the new corner.
EXAMPLE
“Management describes the corner as an improvement. Oliver has requested the floor plan.”
OPEN IT BEFORE YOU DECIDE
The care.
The context.
The correspondence.
A cover only tells you so much. Look inside Oliver’s four-page file and see what each part does.
Exact excerpts from an illustrative case. The complete reader includes the full report, sources and optional notes explaining the personalisation.
Open Oliver’s complete file →PAGE 01 / PRACTICAL CARE
The case as submitted
- Moved from beside the living-room window to a corner about two metres farther away, three weeks ago. The new spot has no direct sun.
- Two lower leaves have yellowed. No rapid collapse, soft stem or visible insects reported.
- Watering remains every Sunday. The upper potting mix still feels damp several days later.
- An inner nursery pot sits in a ceramic outer pot. The owner has not checked whether runoff collects underneath.
The reported move, watering routine and outer pot are recorded as circumstances. The illustration is not evidence.
Read this page in the complete file →THE FIRST CONSULTATION
A little less guesswork.
A great deal more stationery.
A healthy plant is welcome.
Uncertainty has a place in the file.
The planned consultation turns your photographs and care history into a mobile-readable report and a designed four-page PDF. Practical care and Felix’s fiction have their own clearly marked places.
- 01
The evidence
What is visible, what you report, and what remains unknown.
- 02
The possible explanations
Reasonable hypotheses, competing causes and what would distinguish them.
- 03
Three useful next steps
Priorities, sources, review points and when to seek appropriate help.
- 04
The fictional correspondence
Original notes shaped by your plant’s particular arrangements.
Checkout is closed. No payment or delivery deadline is offered yet.
THERE IS MORE THAN ONE WAY IN
What brings you
to the Practice?
A brief diversion, something useful for an actual plant, or a gift with a particular recipient in mind.
Pull up
a leaf.
Give Felix the household arrangements. Leave with a free fictional card.
Visit the Waiting Room →02 / AN ACTUAL PLANTBegin with
what you notice.
Make a useful observation or care-handover sheet. Save it, print it, return to it.
Open the Observation Desk →03 / SOMEONE ELSE’S WINDOWSILLA thoughtful
bit of foliage.
Preview the invitation, add a dedication and see the recipient’s proposed journey.
Make a gift preview →WHEN CONSULTATIONS OPEN
A manageable amount
of botanical administration.
- 01 / THE CIRCUMSTANCES
Bring the plant’s side of it.
Two to four clear photos and a short history of light, watering, drainage and recent changes. No precise home address.
- 02 / THE CONSIDERATION
Evidence before interpretation.
The intended AI-assisted process separates visible clues from your account and possible explanations. Missing evidence is clarified before payment.
- 03 / THE CORRESPONDENCE
A proper file to keep.
A four-page PDF, a readable web report, a practical plan and separately labelled fictional notes.
The intake is currently a local rehearsal. It does not submit information or take payment.
FROM THE EXAMPLE ARCHIVE
Three plants.
Three different situations.
Complete illustrative files, with care sources and optional notes explaining how circumstances shape the report. No customer stories or testimonials.
OliverA CHANGE OF CIRCUMSTANCES
The disputed relocation.
A new corner. The same watering routine. Several unanswered questions.
Read the complete file
PipA PERFECTLY REASONABLE CURIOSITY
Nothing appears to be wrong.
A healthy spider plant. An attentive owner. A file opened nonetheless.
Read the complete file
DarcyA REQUEST FOR CLARIFICATION
The evidence is incomplete.
A dry surface, a wet reading, and a plant with no name on the invitation.
Read the complete fileA useful record.
In your own words.
- PLANT
- A name, or “unknown”
- WHAT I NOTICED
- The facts as you found them
- WHAT CHANGED
- A date, a move, a different routine
- WHAT I WILL CHECK AGAIN
- A question worth coming back to
ILLUSTRATIVE SHEET · YOUR ENTRIES STAY IN YOUR BROWSER
PRACTICAL STATIONERY · FREE
Before you change
everything at once.
Keep a dated observation sheet, or organise your existing instructions for a plant sitter. Unknowns stay unknown. Your own notes stay separate from general guidance.
Download a finished sheet, print it, or explicitly save a copy in this browser. Clear it whenever you choose.
Make a sheet worth keeping →Someone else is helping? Make a handover →LEAVE A LITTLE BETTER INFORMED
Useful reading.
Unusual margins.
“Near the window”
needs a little detail.
Describe the light that reaches the leaves.
Read the light guide →A HEALTHY PLANT IS WELCOMEDoing well
is a useful baseline.
Know what you are trying to preserve.
Read the stable-plant guide →SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCEA result.
A replication.
An open question.
Read the plant-learning evidence and its limits.
Open the evidence dossier →
The illustrations introduce the collection. They are not identification photographs.